Traumatic Incident Reduction Association

TIRA eNotes – August 2021 (No. 28)

Addressing Significant Losses with TIR/Applied Metapsychology Techniques

Songs, stories and conventional wisdom are full of ideas about loss.  How long “should” it take us to recover?  Can we ever really recover at all?  If we really love someone, does that mean that the quality of our life is diminished for the rest of our years?  The songs are mostly about loss of a loved one.  There are many other types of loss.

Besides loss of a loved one, we have loss of a job, loss of a home, loss of our position in a community.  Any of these cause pain.  By definition, if we care about someone or something enough to experience its absence as a loss, that is going to make for a painful event.

A significant loss usually has a number of components.  There may be a period of foreboding or dread, such as the serious illness of someone we care about, or the worry as effects of a natural disaster move toward our home, rumors about our company “down-sizing”, worrying physical symptoms, or even a global pandemic affecting our community.

Then may come a specific event of loss:  a loved one dies, a mudslide or fire destroys our home, we receive a severe diagnosis, we lose our job.  Many losses come in bundles: dealing with our own loss of someone and also the effect of that loss on other members of the family or community, for example.  Or a car accident that injures us, and perhaps other people, and wrecks our car.  We may physically recover for the most part from an accident or illness, yet be left with a loss of mobility.

Then follows the aftermath of any significant loss, as we struggle to go on without whatever or whomever we have lost.  What do Applied Metapsychology, including Traumatic Incident Reduction, have to offer in the way of comfort and healing after loss?

The importance of person-centeredness cannot be over-emphasized.  There are no “shoulds” in Applied Metapsychology.  Your unique experience is your own and you are the expert in your experience.  Right away, there is comfort in that.   Your practitioner may ask you to tell you the whole story of your loss.  Relief comes from just being able to talk about it in as much detail as you wish.

Dealing with a complex loss necessitates sorting out the component parts of it so that each can be addressed effectively.  “Tell me the whole story”, in addition to being helpful in itself, gives us the tools we need to distinguish the various parts of a significant loss.  Basic TIR will address the specific incident of the loss, as well as any related events that you have interest in and attention on.  This in itself brings significant relief.

A technique called Unfinished Business gives us the means to lay to rest the pain of incomplete or undelivered communications.  Future TIR addresses going on without the person or job or possession we have lost.  Numerous other techniques allow us to address residual areas of emotional charge from difficult relationships and situations.

In short, Applied Metapsychology, including TIR, is rich with a variety of techniques to address all aspects of loss.  Each technique is taken to its own end point, where you have a sense of completeness.  Sessions on the area as a whole continue until as long as it is interesting to you. and we stop when you are satisfied that the work is complete.

Loss is certainly part of life.  It has an impact.  At the same time, we can take effective action to ensure that a loss does not cast a shadow over the rest of our life.

To benefit from Applied Metapsychology, see:

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